Monday, January 2, 2012

Feeling peace

 I have been talking about the last couple weeks of moms life, but I haven't really written them down. 
  Mom wanted to make sure that all 3 of her children were OK. Mom was very happy that Tonya was happy with her new love, Justin. She was excited that Tonya was in her new apartment in Santa Cruz.
 Mom would not move in with us until  she knew that Tonya was secure. 
She was happy that Terry is happy in his life.
This information is incredibly healing to me. Mom knew she was at the end of this life. She was making sure that everything was in place before she gave herself permission to go. My mother was always a strong determined woman. Oh and a bit stubborn. 
I know that I was given a huge gift. The last week or so with my mom was the most rewarding for me. About a week before she was hospitalized, I had blogged about how grateful I was, to be able to move her into our home and take care of her. I shared how the years of resentment that I choose to carry, was now gone. Everything we did and everywhere that mom and I went, was effortless, that last week. Mom got her hair done 2 days before her procedure , that she never came home from. We took Christmas pictures with her the day before. Her and I had coffee each morning when she woke up. She loved having coffee in the morning. We got to watch the finale of Survivor that Sunday night. 
I was given the gift of telling my mom that she was a great mom, that I loved her so much, and to not be scared. I asked her to tell Matt that I love and miss him so much.
My life is good. Thank you God!
The path that God has given me to walk along, is a healing one. I get to feel all of these feelings.
 I get to embrace each moment.
God has a plan for each one of us. I am eternally grateful to be HERE to LIVE this LIFE.
 I pray each day to remain Open to whatever God has for me to See, to Do, to say, and to Hear.

No comments:

Post a Comment