A Beautiful Gift of Love and Legacy

Over the past few days,

 I’ve been revisiting my old journals,

 flipping through memories

 captured in ink.

As I read through my entries from 2003,

I stumbled upon something Grandma Chris

had shared with me back then.

It was June 1, 2003—the day we celebrated

 TeaRae’s 10th birthday at Scandia Fun Center.

 After the celebration,

 Matt, Briana, TeaRae, and I went

 to Grandma Chris’s house

 to go swimming.

I don’t remember exactly how the

 conversation started, but at some point,

 she mentioned something very specific:

When her time came, she wanted the song

"To Each His Own" played at her funeral—

not the original version by Eddie Howard,

 but the one by Willie Nelson.

That version was her favorite.

Reading those words in my journal,

 I felt an urgency to call Grandma Chris.

She’s 93 now, battling leukemia,

 with her liver failing due to cancer.

When I reminded her of what she

 had told me all those years ago,

 she shared something new—

the original version of the song had been

 played at her and Joe’s wedding.

They had both loved the

 Willie Nelson rendition, making it

 even more special to her.

In exactly 21 days from now,

 Grandma Chris will have her

 Celebration of Life—

a gathering she planned herself so that her family

and friends could celebrate with her,

rather than without her.

Her funeral,

 however, will be private.

 She has desired to be cremated and

 laid to rest with Matt.

This was a decision made over

 16 years ago,

 after Matt was killed.

At the time, insurance money was delayed,

 and she came to Raymond and me with an offer

—she wanted to give Matt her own crypt in the

 marble wall at Fairmont Memorial Park.

 Grandma Chris also expressed her wish to be

 buried with him when

 her time came.

We agreed.

But later, I found myself wondering—

why had I said yes so quickly?

 Why wouldn’t she want to be buried

 with her husband, Joe, or one of her sons?

But today, I understand.

Matt loved Grandma Chris deeply,

and she loved him even more.

And in the end, it doesn’t really matter where

 we are placed after we’re gone.

 What truly matters is how we love

 while we’re here.

I feel incredibly blessed to have

 these conversations

 with Grandma Chris—and

 with my daughters.

 We get to decide not only how we live,

 but also how we go.

Knowing that Grandma Chris will be reunited

with Matt, just as she has wished for all these years,

brings me peace.

What a beautiful gift.